snorlaxlovesme:

so i cleared my throat today and

and then someone poked me in the side so I laughed

and THEN I FUCKING SNEEZED

and that’s what it’s like being on the second day of your period

i hope this has been educational

(via dadworm-deactivated20150226)

sabrinagrimm:

sabrinagrimm:

me huntin for the pussy

SSTOP REBLOGGING THIS I’M A STRAIGHT 14 YEAR OLD WHITE GIRL

(via dadworm-deactivated20150226)

starxapple:

starxapple:

my grandpa has a date tonight and hes really old and in a wheelchair and has to drag around this breathing machine but hes just sitting there waiting for the hospice shuttle to take him to pick up his date and he looks suPER EXCITED and its the cutest thing ive ever seen 

update he came home and i asked him how it went and he said, “i should have taken an extra tank of oxygen because she took my BREATH AWAY”  

(via dadworm-deactivated20150226)

partybarackisinthehousetonight:

*accidentally slams door* *gets lectured for 84 years*

(via dadworm-deactivated20150226)

renkos:

ma’m will you please stop breakdancing we are trying to deliver your baby

(via jimmykudos-deactivated20150608)